Write a serious Press Release

We need a WOW / SERIOUS / FANTASTIC Press Release that would turn heads and exact to the point. When you place a reaction, make sure you add several created Press Releases already, so we can see how you write. When this job is fine, you can re-write Press Releases several times and also we need related Guest Blog Articles. For US & UK writers with lot's of experience we offer you $30 for this Press Release And offer you $5 for each re-written Press Release / Guest Blog. But they have to be seriously good, no joke - seriously WOW ! You will receive a complete 5-w's plan of approach to setup the Press Release. Each PRESS RELEASE has to include: - Create a WOW headline (written in bold) - Contain important keywords (not SEO optimized, keep it simple) - First 100 characters (these has to be the wow article) - Keep first parapraph's compact (with all information, and interesting to read further) - Find an actual fact (related to the news) - Explain that we have something unique (we have someting unique, but no one knows it yet) - Make it as close to "ready for press" as possible (do not create an advertising, but as a new something) - Make a connection to real world (as we offer something virtual, but works the same) - Write as a third person (regarding newsworthy press release) - Last line of text (this one has to be WOW, to want to know more) - Add some bullet points (on bottom of article, to see easy what the Press Release is about) - Add some little humor (don't be a clown, but just a little humor in it) - Explain it as easy as it is (as you would explain a picture and better) Do not / avoid: - Avoid long sentences and parapraphs - Do not make any grammar mistakes - NEVER - Not longer then 5 paragraphs WE ARE SERIOUS, WE NEED YOU TOO ! and this can be a future long-term job. So do it good.