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    910 idiot jobs fundet, i prisklassen EUR
    work on my logic 6 days left

    I decide to make one system on wasting my and your time and that is posting projects on freelancer.com . and found so many idiots here so I can waste lots of y...without thinking for a second. make sure that you don't forget to report my profile for fucking wasting your time and your bids. thanks for your useless time and keep fuck ups idiot assholes.

    €118 (Avg Bid)
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    9 bud
    Trophy icon Create an Animation 3 days left

    ... Hi Janis (or other name from email list)! I’m just a tomato, but I know how hard it can be to vet the right candidates for your business. Just the other day some idiot tried to slice me into pico de gallo when I CLEARLY belong in a gazpacho or spicy marinara. Amateurs… Red Tomatoes isn’t a typical staffing firm. We’re into a more

    €89 (Avg Bid)
    Garanteret
    €89
    5 indlæg

    Im looking for a Wordpress Guru, some Idiot freelancer killed my Woocommerce Shop, nothing is working !!!!!

    €119 (Avg Bid)
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    47 bud

    Looking for one professional Andriod Programmer , My App required API from 25-> 26 to be able to upload it. My database is all mongo db, and server code...is all mongo db, and server code php - you need to be a fullstack dev, & android app expert. NO TEAMS, ONLY DEV. Only will look at responses starting with 8-2 to lose the idiot sales teams here.

    €207 (Avg Bid)
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    18 bud

    Guild group getting together for blizzcon and i want to make t-shirts, one for each person. The fr...All told 9 different images in a format that can be easily used to create t-shirts. I have no idea what something like this should cost so if you read this and think "this idiot is dreaming" let me know; no disrespect meant. Thanks for reading.

    €94 (Avg Bid)
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    where is the money cheat! You will get foul words from me next. be careful to transfer 100 USD otherwise I shall have you block listed you dirty shameless idiot.

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    ...be/_ghb2zYCbbM Intiial screens before the Oh No begins: Jamie Dimon (2-3) [login to view URL] (and similar footage) A Random idiot [login to view URL] (there are better ways - last line) PayPal [login to view URL]

    €530 (Avg Bid)
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    Some idiot has just messed up my clients menu so that is it no longer collapsing on mobile view, but fully open and overlapping the content. He is not responding to me and I can't leave this as it is and need it fixed right now before my client sees it. It was a "burger" icon in the top right corner before when it was collapsed on mobile and I need

    €20 (Avg Bid)
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    I have a spreadsheet that I use in business for my house refurbishment business, its attached. I want it tidied up basically to make it idiot proof, I want some ideas on how best to do this, either as a spreadsheet or maybe as a database. On the latter it cannot be MS Access as we have a MACs It's important that I be able to talk directly with a designer

    €172 (Avg Bid)
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    23 bud

    We need an idiot-guide post to inform potential new users on the difference between 3D tempered glass and 2.5D tempered glass screen protector. Native Spanish speaker only.

    €20 (Avg Bid)
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    25 bud

    We need an idiot-guide post to inform potential new users on the difference between 3D tempered glass and 2.5D tempered glass screen protector.

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    Our English blog focuses on tempered glass screen protector. We need an idiot-guide post to inform potential new users on the difference between 3D tempered glass and 2.5D tempered glass screen protector. German native speaker only.

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    4 bud

    Our English blog focuses on tempered glass screen protector. We need an idiot-guide post to inform potential new users on the difference between 3D tempered glass and 2.5D tempered glass screen protector.

    €22 (Avg Bid)
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    25 bud

    I need web page fit for cellular Phone where i cant put pictur from any frames very basic idiot proof I also need baners (195x60px)(468x60px) (728 x 90px)(300x60px) (300x250px) (160×600px)

    €80 (Avg Bid)
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    ...rough idea of what I'm looking for in the design, which is a dark blue background with light blue waves crashing fading to a lighter nose. As is clear from this draft, I'm an idiot who knows next to nothing about design. Ideally, the finished product would be at a resolution that can scale up to a decal print for the board. The second image is the

    €128 (Avg Bid)
    Fremhævet Haster Garanteret Topkonkurrence
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    161 indlæg

    ...website pages. The designs themselves are very simple and I would like to see variations in font type & colours. Unlimited revisions is a must, but don't worry, I'm NOT an idiot =) and I will know what I like when I see it. Once this stage is completed, there will be further jobs required with the same purpose. So preferably, I am looking for a designer

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    105 bud

    I have a spreadsheet that I use in business for my house refurbishment business, its attached. I want it tidied up basically to make it idiot proof, and maybe able to use on mobile device or tablet. I want some ideas on how best to do this, either as a spreadsheet or maybe as a database. On the latter it cannot be MS Access as we have a MACs It's

    €126 (Avg Bid)
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    25 bud

    I have a spreadsheet that I use in business for my house refurbishment business, its attached. I want it tidied up basically to make it idiot proof, and maybe able to use on mobile device or tablet. I want some ideas on how best to do this, either as a spreadsheet or maybe as a database. On the latter it cannot be MS Access as we have a MACs It's

    €128 (Avg Bid)
    €128 Gns Bud
    33 bud

    ...the upcoming divorce. She is blindsided now not Guy anymore. At the end he forgives her, and let her stand with him He has the heart of a lion. She treated him like an idiot but he fought back with everything his got. But she never expected, patience was key, to fight when you are strong not when you are weak. He knew it was going to come, so he

    €11484 (Avg Bid)
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    13 bud

    ...TRUCK LOGS WITH TIME BETWEEN STOPS, and TIME spent at stops and able to provide easily printable reports. Along with total drive time. -DESIGN AND EASY TO USE IS KEY. MUST BE IDIOT PROOF. It must look nice and design should be very clean. -Be able to get a list of stores from Quickbooks without double entering. We should be able to export our customer

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    13 bud

    ...the moment there are a couple of simple errors that are stopping people from ordering. I wondered if this is something that you could help me fix today? I am a bit of a tech idiot so I don't have the knowledge to do it myself. The issues are as follows... 1) when setting up an account, the registration email (with confirmation link) is only being sent

    €119 (Avg Bid)
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    1 bud

    ...the moment there are a couple of simple errors that are stopping people from ordering. I wondered if this is something that you could help me fix today? I am a bit of a tech idiot so I don't have the knowledge to do it myself. The issues are as follows... 1) when setting up an account, the registration email (with confirmation link) is only being sent

    €119 (Avg Bid)
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    1 bud

    We want to hire an idiot who will not read this post and just say they can do it without even knowing what the actual job is HAHAHAHA I want one DUMMY how will just respond for this job without even knowing what an affiliate program is. I want someone SO STUPID that they will give me a price for a job and tell me about SEO, Email Marketing and other

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    Hi, i have multiple project...have many more project's to come if i do not die from headache first so i hope to form a nice long term working relationship with someone. Please also talk to me like an idiot when talking tech as i am not educated in this field yet. Please also write ' Brett' for your first word in proposal to be considered. Thx.

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    hi guys - I need a fairly complex Excel solution produced. It is a quotat...do you have a 'x' type of car, which if 'yes' radio button selected, then four questions pop up. I want it to look smart, and have necessary field protections etc to make it idiot proof. If this is something you can do then I'll send you a more specific spec and you can quote.

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    ...of an un-educated fool. I've taken a look around and found the following battery and Wireless Charging Receiver that MAY work - PLEASE DO NOT TAKE MY WORD FOR THIS - I'M AN IDIOT! POSSIBLE BATTERY: YOBLP401235IS2 - Rechargeable Battery, 3.7 V, Lithium Polymer, 130 mAh, Connector[login to view URL]

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    Hello i need a programmer that know how work a mining pool and how t...pool wallet,daemon,and so on,i will help you for config file and setting the firewall ,i need someone the is good with linus and know how to compile and install the script,no idiot questions,no raise to my maximum badget that is 30$,i know that is possible to set it in max 2 hours.

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    ...expert who can use our 30+ pages of powerpoint kit to make a 3 mins animation video to promote our start up and systems for good story telling, crispiness to understand by any idiot and impact. For use at international Pitch Presentation for Global Challenges for example 1- Mass Challenge ( USA UK Mexico Switzerland ) 2- HELLO Tomorrow ( France) 3-

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    I need a proffesional person ...proffesional person that knows what hes doing to help me.. I have a VPS server from contabo,.. and a domain from denmark, that i need propperly connected. I dont want some idiot thats doesent know shit, to bid on this project,.. i have allready wasted my whole day. Must have Teamviewer and Mic MAX budget 15usd.

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    I need a proffesional person that knows what hes doing to hel...proffesional person that knows what hes doing to help me.. I have a VPS server from contabo,.. and a domain from denmark, that i need propperly connected. I dont want some idiot thats doesent know shit, to bid on this project,.. i have allready wasted my whole day. MAX budget 15usd.

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    I need a proffesional person that knows what hes doing to hel...proffesional person that knows what hes doing to help me.. I have a VPS server from contabo,.. and a domain from denmark, that i need propperly connected. I dont want some idiot thats doesent know shit, to bid on this project,.. i have allready wasted my whole day. MAX budget 15usd.

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    ...company have given us versions which look fine, but there seems to be a number of glitches which come to light when using them. The templates need to be user friendly, and as 'idiot proof' as possible so that all of our documents follow the same corporate style. Files required include the following: Client Report (Word) Internal Paper (Word) Aide

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    24 bud

    I have an ...hide subtotal & tax. A screenshot have been attached for details. have a look on it. Do not ask advance payment. I will only pay after checking the customization live. one idiot developer already wasted my 3 days. I have posted the same project earlier also https://www.freelancer.com/projects/php/Opencart-Expert-Need-Make-Some/

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    8 bud

    A software for PC must be able to send drafted emails to multiple email address from a list. it will be able to automatically send emails ether monthly / we...last sent and able to notify the user when a reply come in from one of the list that they will do a total count. preferably for windows only. please make the user interface idiot proof thanks.

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    I need you to write some articles. Stage 1,...emotional performance by an actor on a stage: ‘A walking shadow, a poor player That struts and frets his hour upon the stage And then is heard no more: it is a tale Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, Signifying nothing.’ Classic image of the seven ages of man, based on Shakespeare’s monologu

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    We need a new website that discusses our current product and events as well as our new QR business and Beacon technology. We need customer...NOT accept any other bid you provide with a higher number after!!!! So if you DO NOT ARE NOT SMART ENOUGH to read the actual job description and post I will know that your an idiot and will never hire you! Thanks

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    ...-MANNO YOU CAN T DO THIS. YOU ARE GOING TO KILL THE DOOR THAT FED YOU-SAID JOKER -NO BOSS IT S NOT LIKE THAT BUT IT'S JUST ABOUT MONEY AND [login to view URL] IS EVERY MAN DREAM -YOU IDIOT-SAID JOKER MANNO SHOT JOKER IN HIS HEAD AND THEN HE [login to view URL] WAS THE END OF BIG BOSS JOKER -HAHAHA I AM THE BOSS NOW -YOU THINK SO -SAID TOMMAS(BADLY INJURED) WHO SHOOT

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    ...-MANNO YOU CAN T DO THIS. YOU ARE GOING TO KILL THE DOOR THAT FED YOU-SAID JOKER -NO BOSS IT S NOT LIKE THAT BUT IT'S JUST ABOUT MONEY AND [login to view URL] IS EVERY MAN DREAM -YOU IDIOT-SAID JOKER MANNO SHOT JOKER IN HIS HEAD AND THEN HE [login to view URL] WAS THE END OF BIG BOSS JOKER -HAHAHA I AM THE BOSS NOW -YOU THINK SO -SAID TOMMAS(BADLY INJURED) WHO SHOOT

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    ...-MANNO YOU CAN T DO THIS. YOU ARE GOING TO KILL THE DOOR THAT FED YOU-SAID JOKER -NO BOSS IT S NOT LIKE THAT BUT IT'S JUST ABOUT MONEY AND [login to view URL] IS EVERY MAN DREAM -YOU IDIOT-SAID JOKER MANNO SHOT JOKER IN HIS HEAD AND THEN HE [login to view URL] WAS THE END OF BIG BOSS JOKER -HAHAHA I AM THE BOSS NOW -YOU THINK SO -SAID TOMMAS(BADLY INJURED) WHO SHOOT

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    Some idiot has logged into my website and changed details so website now having some problems. I need fixed asap [login to view URL] Need fixed within twenty minute my shop is live shop and lots of customers

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    I already have a website mockup. But my designer is an idiot, so I need to hire you to update and beautify a few parts of the existing mockup without changing any other things. I’ll provide the link and also the details on what to amend. You can send whatever file, like PDF or whatsoever for me to show to my current website designer. Don’t

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    I have a web application which involves photo uploads. I eventually want several different-sized v...S3 (which I'm already using for storage of the photos), can potentially create the resized photos for me as they're uploaded. I like that idea very much, but I'm kind of an idiot with AWS, so I need some help configuring it to do what I've described!

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    Have no time to do this myself - prefer someone else to help and make a few bucks so I can work on all this other stuff, stacked-up and waiting. Idiot who worked on this project before plastered UTF-8 langauge characters into Latin 1 and resulted in a bunch of nonsense. Need these mixed format DBs/tables converted to UTF-8 and the proper characters

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    This is a cover for a novel. It’s a comedy about a fat idiot that goes from his home in London to Silicon Valley hoping to turn his idea into billions. It’s called “The Biggest Idea in the World”. I’d like a cover to reflect a) it’s funny b) it’s tech-related in silicon valley c) he’s a fat idiot.

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    ...Cache. - I want to use Amazon Cloudfront as a CDN - I want to use an Amazon SSL Certificate to provide SSL = Green Lock I need a simple, clear, easy and concise (yes, idiot-proof!) step-by-step instructional guide (preferably with screenshots or images) on i) setting up Cloudfront for WP; ii) setting up an Amazon SSL Certificate for SSL = Green

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    We hired an Indian developer 6 hours ago and they have not fixed the problem, they have made it worse! We need to hire a real expert who is not an idiot. Job 1: The previous developer broke our ''Payment Options'' section of our checkout, so we need someone to fix this. Job 2: Replace old [login to view URL] code on Checkout Page with new McAfee code

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    I have the product to make a website/landing page/funnel/animation video I just need help putting it all together- I work full time and want to start the pr...project but know I will either take forever and/or never do it at all and there it will sit! Please comment "clicksfunnel expert here" and thats the way to prove you are not an idiot spammers.

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    Hello I need a database that can calculate how much stock i have, what i have sold, and what the profit level is. I need it to be idiot-proof. So i need it to be very simple. EACH QUERY FORM IS ON A SEPARATE PC. I press one button for each product, and it prints a barcode. -I need to be able search products -I need to be able to

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    Hello I need a database that can calculate how much stock i have, what i have sold, and what the profit level is. I need it to be idiot-proof. So i need it to be very simple. EACH QUERY FORM IS ON A SEPARATE PC. I press one button for each product, and it prints a barcode. -I need to be able search products -I need to be able to add products

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    I am in need for some designs done for my website. I am the owner of a construction company specialising in loft conversions. i have several pages on my site that expla...different types. If you visit my website [login to view URL] you will understand what i mean. I'm unsure of cost but i do not expect to be paying silly rates!! I'm note an idiot!

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