HumorJobs

I OptimistikChic I need a YouTube into. I have selected several photos that represent me. Choose whatever you like. Simple, with light humor on a serious subject. My message to incorporate in intro: “There’s only one kind of Bully allowed here”. (Picture reference to my French Bulldog by Buddha) My French Bulldog is pretty popular on IG. Remember, my channel is for Bipolar Disorder and Bullying - with an emphasis on an optimistic attitude. Good vibes. I want it uplifting but simple and to the point. Nothing too happy. Just the things I stand for. I need a YouTube banner image, a very simple easy to ready logo reading: (watch spelling and what you see elsewhere) “OptimistikChic” Transparent background. For Youtube banner…? I need guidance. So...

Basado en la linea gráfica del flayer que hicieron para nosotros, precisamos el diseño gráfico de 3 posts para Facebook anunciando los botes que se juegan. Uno diferente para cada juego pero en la misma linea gráfica. Los juegos son: - Euromillone...del Estado) y el de nuestra administración de loterías (La Chata) También debemos incluir los logos de juego responsable y de mayores de 18 años. deberíamos usar distinto tono de color quizás para cada juego, quizás acorde con los colores del logotipo, y distinto personaje o personajes en cada uno. Estaría muy bien incluir alguna frase distinta para cada juego, atractiva y divertida en clave de humor. y una llamada a la acción del tipo Juega ahor...

...flourishes under pressure and maintains a professional manner under any and all circumstances. This person is disciplined, efficient and has the ability coordinate and follow-up to get things done. We are seeking someone with an exceptional eye for detail who can take the ball and run with it - at a minimum you must demonstrate stellar computer skills, a leader who is organized, has a sense of humor, and is a fast learner with ability to think on your feet. If you are motivated by looking back on your day with pride in a job well done, not stopping until it’s done it right AND quickly, WE WANT YOU. Fluent English phone and writing skills a MUST. Ability to work during our business hours a MUST (our office hours are 9am to 6pm New York/Miami time). This is a full-time posi...

...a sitcom-style web series sometime in the fall of 2019/winter of 2020. Each episode is 25 minutes long. I need to find an animation studio willing to take on the project. Scripts are already written and developed, and we will be recording the dialogue before the animation. It should be a balance of good-quality, realistic 2D animation and somewhat fast-paced to account for some of the physical humor. For now, we just need the pilot, set to release in July of 2019. Depending on how well that performs, we'll decide if we want to proceed with the entire show itself. If you make the pilot however, and we do decide to proceed with the show, you're excepted to animate the rest of it. For reference, there are three seasons, and 15 episodes in each season, except the final o...

Hello I need 20 top trending novelty original high definition designs for a online novelty socks business. The designer should be able to understand the style and type of print/design that would go well with a knee high sock length. The categories for these should include all the following animal designs humor ( cats and dogs ), pregnancy humor , history ( Mona Lisa etc other top trending designs you can think of history related , nurse humor , and the last category can be up to you.

I am looking for someone to create aviation safety themes, with catchy one liners, and some with a little humor but with conveying an important message to create aviation safety posters. I want something very unique and original, something that will stand out. I am looking for a long-term relationship. Some of the areas within Aviation Safety will be Flight Operations, Aircraft Maintenance, Ground Handling etc. I need 10 themes accordingly. For the 10 themes I will pay 20 USD. Please check out attachment of some examples so that you get an better idea.

...provide feedback directly to Cryptoactive Traders. You also agree not to share our names or any details of this project. Integrity & Results: At the end of the day, what we expect are results and for you to have the same level of integrity as the rest of the team. We are all held accountable for our own actions and have a no bullsh*t mentality. Honesty is the best policy and a good attitude and humor are encouraged. Discipline and work ethic is valued. Lying, procrastination, or missing deadlines will only result in termination. If you feel like this is something you can handle, we look forward to working with you....

We are looking for a local video producer in the UK for the production of 1x video creative, targeting female audiences. The video is to be used as advertisement on Social Media in the UK to promote our mobile application called 'Azar'. Azar is a social discovery platform that mat...camera, as we want it to appear as a screen recording of the main model having a face time conversation with someone they just met on Azar. This way we add a more realistic (viral) feel to the video and it will seem more like a viral video (think Vine) than a generic and boring advertisement. We will provide guidance on creative concepts, but to get an idea, we usually make videos with elements of humor and surprise (see: reference files). If you're interested in this project, don't...

...iniciales completamente escritos b. Prosa abierta respecto a lo que se espera de cada capítulo d. Resumen de cada uno de los capítulos del libro ( APROX. 8 capítulos) LA PERSONA QUE SE BUSCA Busco una persona que tenga experiencia y/o pasión por la ficción y que esté influenciad@ por la cultura popular en temas de la siguiente naturaleza: a. Conspiraciones b. Extraterrestres c. Acertijos d. Humor negro e. Misterios Se busca que la persona que tome este proyecto pueda continuar el libro basándose en las referencias que serán compartidas y que pueda sumarse al estilo narrativo de los 2 primeros capítulos que ya se encuentran escritos. La metodología deseada es que contra cada capítulo nuevo se pueda...

Hello, I am looking for an illustrator for a small poetry book. The book consists 50 poems and will be published in German language. The illustrations should reflect the subtle humor of the poems and should be hand drawn.

We s...over on and want to edit the streams into highlights for one of our YouTube channels: The purpose of these videos is to be entertainment. We have assets ready to make all the highlights cohesive with our channel (intro, outro, sound effects, music). We also have an editing guide with specific ways to potentially add humor, the font we preferr, etc. A good example of how we would like our edits to turn out is this video: Requirements before submitting proposal: - Watch the example video linked above Requirements for editor: - Familiarity with gaming videos - Familiarity with YouTube videos and YouTube editing styles - Familiarity with internet culture, memes

...some time. The person who does this work, should actually like hearing jokes, and appreciate that not everything is funny to everyone, but you'll try to make it funny as you translate it. Younger people have labelled any spoken joke-telling as "Dad Jokes", as if it's something that older people do that younger people reject. If you are like that, please don't try to get this job. An element of humor is usually a surprise ending. Some jokes depend on an English word having 2 or more meanings. You get to the end and realize the meaning of the word is different than you assumed at first. But when translating to a non-English language, it's unlikely that the word will have the same 2 or more meanings. So a joke may need to be deleted, if it can&...

...some time. The person who does this work, should actually like hearing jokes, and appreciate that not everything is funny to everyone, but you'll try to make it funny as you translate it. Younger people have labelled any spoken joke-telling as "Dad Jokes", as if it's something that older people do that younger people reject. If you are like that, please don't try to get this job. An element of humor is usually a surprise ending. Some jokes depend on an English word having 2 or more meanings. You get to the end and realize the meaning of the word is different than you assumed at first. But when translating to a non-English language, it's unlikely that the word will have the same 2 or more meanings. So a joke may need to be deleted, if it can&...

...some time. The person who does this work, should actually like hearing jokes, and appreciate that not everything is funny to everyone, but you'll try to make it funny as you translate it. Younger people have labelled any spoken joke-telling as "Dad Jokes", as if it's something that older people do that younger people reject. If you are like that, please don't try to get this job. An element of humor is usually a surprise ending. Some jokes depend on an English word having 2 or more meanings. You get to the end and realize the meaning of the word is different than you assumed at first. But when translating to a non-English language, it's unlikely that the word will have the same 2 or more meanings. So a joke may need to be deleted, if it can&...

Hey there, I'm making multiple 1-2 minute videos on business management and I'd love to find an awesome editor that can take all the takes and make the work look professional and great! This will be for the long run because I'm planning to make about 5-10 videos this way every month. I like to keep it professional but entertaining, creative and fun, so a good sense of humor is an asset for making my videos work! I need an editor who can take a seemingly dull video of someone talking to the camera, and make it fun, entertaining, creative. Using animated elements moving around the screen would be cool, to illustrate the point of what the speaker is saying. This is an example of what we're looking for, though my speaker is not as fast-paced as this one:

iRobot – Data science intern Intern_R151?_ga=2.103666624.1116987214.1554409300-859315882.1553655738 Imagine the future you could help us build.  Teamwork, not just tech work. We are tech fu...strong problem-solving and analytical skills  You have rich communication skills to explain complex solutions to non-data science peers  You also have strong computer skills in your language of choice (such as Python, Clojure, Mathematica, Scala/Java, R, etc.).  You have graduate-level background in data science, statistics, or mechanical/building/electrical engineering  You have a sense of humor, and enjoy solving puzzles  You are self-motivated and able to work in a dynamic, delivery-focused environment

Hello, We're looking for an infographic designer for recurring work on our Marketing team. Below are some of the things that we're looking for: - Able to convey information in a contemporary, engaging and fun style - Ability to follow our brand guidelines - Meeting deadlines - Strong attention to detail - Sense of humor If you think you'll be a good fit, apply below with links to your portfolio! If you have any questions, please feel free to reach out. I've attached some examples that I like! Looking forward to connecting with you! Thanks

The eventual project is to create a list of 2 -4 birthdays of famous people (celebrities, historical figures, political figures born on each day of the year and some details about them. . However, this first project will be to find them for the May 1-7. To see if you are capable of doing this. LIST REQUIREMENTS The goal is to find 2 people famous for something profound and 2 famous for ...contrast between a person who has truly contributed to the world and someone who is famous for something less valuable. Experience: We are looking for someone who has GREAT familiarity with current American Pop Culture: Music, Movies, TV Shows, Social Media etc. This can be delivered in a simple word processor format. We are looking for a researcher and information gatherer with a sense of ...

I'm looking for 6 splash screens to be designed for me for a new mobile game I'm developing. -Splash screens will all have characters (animals / humans) which we will provide to you as guidance -Should be colorful and pop and tell the story of the game -Must be high quality and have some elements of cartoon and 'humor' -Dimensions to be provided (based on iOS / Android standards) -Glad to provide some flexibility with creative direction Don't access Asian Good luck

I own a petite fitness clothing company. I need someone to write a blog for me with relevant topics, being a petite girl in the fitness and fashion industry, our struggles and perspective. Humor/ sarcasm/ edgy is a plus because that's my personal style. FEMALE PREFERRED as this blog has to do with petite/ fitness/ fashion for women 18-35

...simple supporting graphics and layout that you will create. This initial design might be rather basic to you but many more will be needed going forward so I'm looking to build a good working relationship as well. More details will be discussed with suitable candidates. Please reply with a portfolio and include samples of t-shirt designs you’ve made. A little about me, I have a great sense of humor, am down to earth and am happiest when I'm being creative and bringing idea to life. Thanks for taking the time. I’m looking forward to hearing from you....

...would like skit to have more of a personal feel to it and most important I want it to be FUNNY! I’m looking for someone who is a creative writer that understands web design and development enough to write a script for it. Again, I want something with humor and a personal touch to it. The script needs to be at least 30 seconds and no more than 1 minute. The script we be for a commercial for my web design and development company. The animated video I'm making will be similar to the one below, but with a lot more personality and humor. Please show any example of your previous script writing....

We are looking for an authoritative, definitive article and backed up with detailed research that delivers the final word on a topic. • Blog freestyle with humor • No fluff or padded content. • Understanding of SEO • The content of the must be evergreen as possible The writer must be able to speak fluent English and meet deadlines. Compensation - $3 per 500 words. Please type the word "I READ" at the beginning of your application so that we know you are reading this post and avoid auto-bidding.

Hi Shawn! I wanted to see how you are! We were once remote workers adapting to our environments... Thought I'd give you a shout knowing your in the area. I've bumped your lunch rate to 25$ an hour and added an additional hour for activities just in case :D Consider it bad humor but I figured we should meet!

YouTube short shows with skits, adult (but not to the point of out of content) humor. details and more info will be provided after project accepted. please provide 3 most reason projects and a view of portfolio.

...shot with a (high quality) smartphone camera, as we want it to appear as a screen recording of the main model having a face time conversation with someone they just met on Azar. This way we add a more realistic feel to the video and it will seem more like a viral video than a generic and boring advertisement. The concept of the video can be fairly simple, but it's important to add elements of humor and surprise. This is because the people who meet on Azar are strangers to each other when they first meet, so the interaction has to feel easygoing at first, with the addition of a sudden/humorous event happening in the background after a few seconds to maintain the viewers' attention. Imagine for example someone suddenly walking in on you while you are having an intimate...

We are looking for *Native Writers* who can research and write long-form articles 2-3k words. We are looking for an authoritative, definitive article and backed up with detailed research that delivers the final word on a topic. • Blog freestyle with humor/Technology/Virtual Reality • The source must be reliable, authoritative and varied. • No fluff or padded content. • Understanding of SEO • The content of the must be evergreen as possible The writer must be able to speak fluent English and meet deadlines. Compensation - $3 per 500 words. Please type the word "I agree" at the beginning of your application so that we know you are reading this post and avoid auto-bidding.

...Qualifications: 1. bachelor’s degree and above (qualified with work visa application) 2. Native speakers preferred. But if there are some non-natives whose pronunciation is very good and qualified for working visa application, it’s also ok. 3. More than one year teaching experience 4. Age: 21-38 5. good communication and work well with colleagues, students, parents. 6. well organized; sense of humor and possess a desire to develop opportunities for students and teachers both in and out of the classroom. and presentable Benefits: 1. Salary: 13000 - 16000RMB ($1200) 2. Insurance: Accidental insurance 3. Accommodation: 1000 - 2000rmb Housing bonus or single apartment 4. Yearly Round Trip Tickets: finish one year contract and renew contract successfully Contact Dove (...

The bachelor's name is Justin. The party location is Primland, VA. The party Date is June 2019. Activities will include golfing, shotgun sports, and fly fishing. The logo will be embroidered and/or screen printed. The logo should look good in small (approximately 3") size. We are looking for creativity/humor but nothing vulgar in the logo design. Just to be clear... I am looking for something more than just his name in the logo. Please try to incorporate a few of the elements included in the description above (i.e. activities, location, date, and bachelor party).

...to an english representative Information that the customer can email us at os@ and we will answer as soon as possible What you need to do Write both messages in text Save both messages in 1 PDF Upload the PDF as your entry Guidelines Our tone of voice is easy, fun and warm. We are helpful and always put our customers first. Avoid Avoid aggressive or tough jokes Avoid childish humor Avoid classic, institutional customer service tone of voice The deadline for this project is friday april 5h at 12:00 CEST +1 hour Instructions again This contest is about writing two messages for our danish customer support line. Both messages will be recorded in danish and played in two different scenarios. Feedback We have very limited capacity to answer questions or give individual fee...

I am in the finance arena and work with realtors and home builders...and I am trying to attract more business and a better quality of business as well. I have a few concepts already conceived and need feedback as well as actual production of the videos. I am open to new ideas and am looking to someone who can add a bit of humor to what is normally a very dry business. I would be interested in longer-term business relationship for the right person.

...to releasing my first videogame done in a form of an adult visual novel and looking for a native English-speaking copywriter (of course preferably with experience in writing and copywriting adult content) to help to touch up final dialogs that are already written. The game is a choice-based visual novel filled with adult content, but also with a sense of humor and that will be fun to play! So it's great if you have a passion for adult humor and can improve dialogs giving them that touch of both. No need to come up with the content, only need to improve the existing one. The task should not take more than a few days and can be easily done over the weekend. The game will be released on Patreon. IMPORTANT: PLEASE APPLY ONLY IF YOU ARE A NATIVE ENGLISH SPEAKER. Pleas...

I've recently started an online business selling Home and Garden and Health ...I'd like to start a blog on the site, one written specifically for women over age 40, and I'm hopeful I can find someone to write articles once or twice per week. Of course, there's a ton of topics to write about catering to middle aged women, so it won't be hard to come up with ideas. The one thing I feel is really important though, for this to work, is for the writer to have a sense of humor. I think the blog should be about real topics, stories and ideas important to middle aged women, written in an entertaining and humorous way. In other words, we need to get the women to lighten up and start laughing more. I know nothing about writing blogs. I'm easy to wor...

have sense of humor and native English speaker? Experienced in article writing?

Who understands topics like en...illustrator to translate concepts like mentioned above into unique and fun illustrations. I would need 12-15 illustrations that I can use as a divider between book chapters (A4 landscape format). A first test task within the contest would be: How would you illustrate "MVP, Minimal viable product"? I kind of like attached style. But it doesn't have to be like that. So it's basically about a little weird humor and expressive and bold translations of abstract concepts/ideas into a self-explaining illustration. Please apply only if you really understood the challenge;) Thanks!! Once I decided for a certain style/illustrator I would need more illustrations for topics like - Target group - Pivot - Business model - Idea - Story telli...

WHAT WE ARE LOOKING FOR: --Original artwork/Design --Using some form of Disney symbolism while avoiding trademark --Potentially some form or reference to Jiminy Cricket --Potentially the use of 3...animated movies. The name of the youtube channel will be The Jiminy Cricket Crew. Jiminy Cricket is a character who personifies the role of the 'conscience' in the film Pinocchio. The goal of the channel is providing insightful and family friendly commentary on childhood/modern classics created by Disney/Pixar. On each episode 3 people who make up the cricket crew will be providing commentary using humor and critical analysis. The most important is avoiding any form of trademark issues with Disney. Which is why we want something original but inspired around Jiminy Cricket and ...

...to think ahead. Creativity and thinking outside the box is a must. You gotta think in terms of "how can I make this happen" - always. I´m gonna be very direct and I need you to be okay with that. You´re gonna be doing research for all kinds of things - from how to create an etsy store to SEO. You don´t have to be a pro already as long as you are willing to work hard to get me the info I need. Humor is nice. I want us to have fun working together! If you speak german too that would be a plus. I´m currently gonna hire you for a few hours a week or project wise but I definitely am gonna keep you around if we vibe and create amazing successful things together. Meaning this is the chance for an amazing business relationship with increasing hours :)...

We are looking for *Native Writers* who can research and write long-form articles 2-3k words. We are looking for an authoritative, definitive article and backed up with detailed research that delivers the final word on a topic. • Blog freestyle with humor/Technology/Virtual Reality • The source must be reliable, authoritative and varied. • No fluff or padded content. • Understanding of SEO • The content of the must be evergreen as possible The writer must be able to speak fluent English and meet deadlines. Compensation - $3 per 500 words. Please type the word "I agree" at the beginning of your application so that we know you are reading this post and avoid auto-bidding.

...roughly 1 hour per day. The second daily task will be to manage, and engage with the community, through social media, platform messages and emails. Anytime someone comments on a post, we would like the web manager to reach out and see if they would be interested in liking our facebook page or following us on social media. It's important to be an excellent communicator and have a great sense of humor. One of your core responsibilities is to post clever, appropriate memes and jokes every so often. Looking for native English speakers who will be available for 2 hours a day during typical North American working hours. Our website is Livestock.com. We're a marketplace for livestock and agricultural equipment. In your bid, please include your favorite social media...

Yay, steampunk! Serious design, along the line of concept art or environmental within the steampunk genre. While this would be an eBook, a fu...physical copies. As part of this job, you would get access to a copy of the manuscript for a better idea of things like characters, settings, and the ship, as well as first dibs on other paid cover arts for future books in the series. As for the book itself, it's Victorian era (obviously), action-adventure, the first in what will be an ongoing series, and just fun. Not too deep but with a mix of humor, action, and horror elements. Think Firefly meets Supernatural, in terms of overall feel. I would prefer open conversation about cover ideas and concepts before any art is done. I would greatly prefer to see examples of your art b...

I will send you a Real Estate article that needs to be re-written in perfect conversational English. Please research the topic and find several good articles from different sources with the same topic to get inspiration. No copy/paste allowed. Only unique content with personality. Must have basic knowledge of the United States Real Estate industry. Humor is always a plus! Target reader audience: Home sellers. Please view the attached articles for inspiration. As a test, please re-write and submit a short Real Estate article based on one of the attached articles. If it is good, then I will hire you for long term, on-going work. I will need at least 4 quality articles per week. Fixed pay per article.

We have some really nice wall clock designs that we need descriptions and keywords for. For each design, we need an enticing paragraph describing the design. A 'hook' or humor will be beneficial and appreciated. This project requires copy and keywords for 25 clock designs. We will be happy to create milestones (like for every 5 clocks you provide copy for). For example... a Billiards Clock (see example at: ) Rack 'em up! The perfect clock for any aspiring hustler or shark, our billiards clock is sure to impress. Featuring a cue and the 1 through 12 balls against a soft felt green background, you'll know exactly what time you started winning. Available in both racked and broken formats. Conveniently on the latter, 13 through 15 are sunk already, so if you'r...

===================================== To: Boss (DESKTOP-G5M3R3Q/<a21fcb9ccd4bd880>) at Fri Mar 15 11:38:57 2019 ------------------------------------- Amazing Translation using Humor. I have some interesting book wrote by Russian, but I don't know how about the story in a book. Can't use the translator to understood what kinds of story are there. It is not include edit text, just read and understand what had wrote are there. Included with attach file but it is only test book for seeing your skill. welcome everybody if you can translate to English!

...PDF PSD, etc. -Simple, clean, minimalist (NOT busy) -Theme Ideas: Antique, technical, OR your choice ***Add a 3D feel to your AWESOME design (see attached 3d examples and Pop out example..<---I dont want an exact image of these but instead use images that relate to photography with white background to look like examples) *** ***Description wording to be catchy and fun with a clean sense of humor We are a Husband and Wife business. We do: -Video (i will link this to another page) -Graphic Design (i will link this to another page) -Websites (i will link this to another page) -Family Photography (i will link this to another page) Other Category Sections to include: -Wedding Venue (i will link this to another page) -Online Store- we sell candles, neck...

...amazing custom 2D Animated Explainer Videos with the following features: • Royalty free Background Music • 60 Seconds and 90 seconds Running Time • Background Imagery • Professional Voice Over Recording • Script-writing • Add my Logo, Website and my video intros and outros in the video. (I already have the intros/outros and logos ready). • Unlimited revisions • Some of the videos to have some humor • 100% commercial rights to use anywhere • Ultra HD videos • File Formats, not let than these three different formats AVI, MOV, MP4. (The more you can provide the better). This will be a long-term project. First phase of 5 - 10 videos, second phase 8 -12 videos and then preferably one or two videos every month. I will do...

The task is to create a 1min video trailer to an audio recording provided. Your footage needs to fit the audio script and the overall context. In other words your graphics needs to picture what my words in the recording says. This is the effect I want to achieve: Watch it from minimum: 0:00 to 1:07 min to see w...Relaxed Matt Matt engineer at work (see video from 8:10 to 8:16): Professional looking Matt: :li:activity:6368915618330079232 Marketing Strategy Matt: Try to make your video relaxed. Serious but with humor. Please let me know in case you need any more clarification or examples.

We are looking for *Native English Writers* who can research and write long-form articles 3-5k words. We are looking for an authoritative, definitive article and backed up with detailed research that delivers the final word on a topic. • Blog freestyle with humor/Technology/Virtual Reality • The source must be reliable, authoritative and varied. • No fluff or padded content. • Understanding of SEO • The content of the must be evergreen as possible The writer must be able to speak fluent English and meet deadlines. Pay $3 per 500 words. Please type the word "BEST WRITER" at the beginning of your application so that we know you are reading this post and avoid auto-bidding.

I'm looking for a U.S. comedy writer and researcher to help with writing some A or B memes. I need 365 Statements and Comparison memes. Examples: 1. Would you rather drink A) Pepsi or B) Coke 2. Who has the best Fries A) McDonalds or B) Burger King 3. Are you going to eat A) Big Mac or B) Whop...memes. I need 365 Statements and Comparison memes. Examples: 1. Would you rather drink A) Pepsi or B) Coke 2. Who has the best Fries A) McDonalds or B) Burger King 3. Are you going to eat A) Big Mac or B) Whopper Looking for none political, non sports, non negative comparisons. Comparisons that can be funny and 90% of the population can relate too. Think more Seinfeld, common sense type of humor and comparisons. ** Please include 2-3 Examples in your Bid so I know you understa...

Hiring a graphic designer/ illustrator to create three graphic memes to explain the benefits of our brand's API. Humor is appreciated! Qualifications: Experience in Photoshop/ Illustrator, a portfolio of previous work either linked in your portfolio or online, the ability to have a turn around time of under one week for all three memes. I've attached a PDF that shares some of the visuals (in words) that we would like to be depicted. Ideally, you'll select three and we can work to make the three separate memes look similar in style.

I'm looking for a U.S. comedy writer and researcher to help with writing some A or B memes. I need 365 Statements and Comparison memes. Examples: Would you rather drink A) Pepsi or B) Coke Who has the best Fries A) McDonalds or B) Burger King Are you going to eat A) Big Mac or B) Whopper Looking for none political, non sports, non negative comparisons. Comparisons that ...some A or B memes. I need 365 Statements and Comparison memes. Examples: Would you rather drink A) Pepsi or B) Coke Who has the best Fries A) McDonalds or B) Burger King Are you going to eat A) Big Mac or B) Whopper Looking for none political, non sports, non negative comparisons. Comparisons that can be funny and 90% of the population can relate too. Think more Seinfeld, common sense type of humor a...